Homemade remedies, no thank you!

Semana Santa break is over and I am back into the swing of things here in Mollejones. I had a great break at home in the States. I indulged in all my favorite foods, took plenty of hot showers, and spent quality time with my family, friends, and dogs. Back to work…

I had a rough first day back on Monday. Things started off well, with my fifth and sixth graders proving to me that they hadn’t forgotten anything over the week break. It wasn’t until after lunch that the day took a turn for the worse. I was in the middle of teaching my fourth graders when I suddenly got very hot and my stomach started churning. I’ve never had a sickness hit me so hard and so fast. I ran to the bathroom where I found students who had chosen the bathroom as their hiding spot in a game of hide-and-seek, I yelled at them to get out and then I proceeded to throw-up while all my students gathered outside the door wondering what was wrong with me. I put my head under the sink and took a deep breath before opening the door to my students who were all standing there looking at me like I was a sick puppy. I apologized to the students I yelled at and then went looking for my director to tell her I was sick. I found her in the kitchen and before I could even get a word out she asked me what was wrong… apparently I looked as bad as I felt. She asked me if I wanted to ride back to Pacayitas on a motorcycle or wait a few hours for the bus. I chose the latter option, as the idea of riding on the back of the motorcycle didn’t sit well with my stomach and I proceeded to get sick again. I asked all the students playing in my classroom to please leave, I closed the door and sprawled out on the cold tile floor. I called my mom… I don’t think anyone ever grows out of wanting their mommy when they are sick. A little while later my director knocked on the door to give me some fresh squeezed lime. No water, no sugar, just straight lime. She said it would settle my stomach… but it didn’t. Later, one of my student’s mothers came with her house remedy for stomach viruses. Every woman here has her own solution, it seems. She told me it would taste bad but it would heal me. I’ve tasted some pretty bad homemade medicines here before, but this one takes the gold medal for absolute worst tasting thing that has ever entered my mouth. I knew I was in for something awful as I brought the cup up to the mouth… the smell was so bad. I closed my eyes and took a sip. I don’t know how my body managed to swallow the nastiness. I handed the cup back, shaking my head, repeating “no! no! no!” I would rather be sick for the rest of my life than have to ever taste another drop of that “remedy.” The school cook, who has become a good friend, laughed at me and said I must be exaggerating. She took a spoon to try some for herself. I was shaking my head at her and telling her she would regret it, but she didn’t listen. She took a spoon full and it was less than a second before she spewed the liquid out on to the ground. She then put her mouth under the sink and rinsed out the leftover awfulness. I laughed and said, “I told you so.” I sprawled back on my classroom floor and waited for the bus.

I was so excited when the bus finally arrived. I couldn’t wait to get home and into my bed. For some reason it hadn’t even crossed my mind about how terrible the bus ride home would be. The unpaved, mountain roads, make for the most uncomfortable rides on any given day in any sort of vehicle. If a cockroach were to climb aboard a “Shake-Weight” he might then know what a ride to Pacayitas feels like. It is not pleasant. I set a goal for myself to not toss my cookies on the way home. It was the longest 40 minutes of my life. I came close to getting sick at one point, but a heaven sent gust of wind flowed through the window, settling my stomach. I made it back to my house just in time to get sick there. Shockingly, no one was home. I was sure my host mom would have heard by now that I was sick and would be waiting for me. I have to say I was a little relived that she hadn’t yet heard because I was not in the mood for any more homemade remedies. I just wanted to sleep. When my host mom came home and saw that I was sick she immediately went into doctor mode. I am so grateful that she cares enough to look out for me but communicating in Spanish seems to get 100 times more difficult when I am sick and it is so frustrating. She kept asking me what hurts, and what I want, and what I need but my brain couldn’t put it together in Spanish to explain to her all that I wanted and needed. I finally was able to keep down some water and Tylenol PM and passed out for the night. I didn’t feel any better when I woke up Tuesday morning. My stomach was still not in the mood for food. I spent the morning in and out of sleep. Finally around noon I told my host mom I wanted to try to eat. She made me beef broth and rice. I managed to eat a little and then fell back asleep for a couple hours. I woke up feeling much better. My headache had subsided and my stomach pain was gone. I was so relieved that whatever stomach bug I had only lasted twenty-four hours. It was a miserable 24 hours and I am glad it is over. I have been feeling great ever since waking up from that nap on Tuesday.

I am so proud of all my students, as they have managed to retain all the information I taught them before their break. They actually appear to be more focused than ever, which I am sure won’t last long. Time is flying by. I cannot believe it is almost May! Well, I better get back to work… I’ve got to finish making my body-parts bingo boards.