"Welcome to Being a Teacher"

Last night I was Skyping with my high school Spanish teacher/advisor. We have kept in touch over the years and I consider her a great friend and mentor. I was complaining to her about the hoops I have to jump through for my TEFL certification and after about five minutes of listening to me bitch she interrupted me and said “Laura, welcome to being a teacher…”

It seems I am just now grasping all that comes with being a teacher. There are amazing times, when my students are sponges and taking in everything that I am teaching them. There are not so amazing times when I spend a whole class period explaining one word. There are times of pure joy, like when every student passed my first exam. There are times of pure frustration, like today, when I caught a student cheating on my test. Sweet, innocent Angie…

Yes, the same Angie that has given me gifts… a spandex shirt, and a dirty pink tank top. I was shocked when I noticed the little piece of paper that she was cupping in her hand. My heart dropped as I walked towards her desk and her guilty eyes met mine. There was no hiding it. She was caught. I took the piece of paper from her and asked her who wrote it. “I did.” I asked her if she wrote it before or during the test. “Before.” I looked over it and realized that most of her answers were wrong on the cheat sheet and that there were words on it that I never even taught them. I am afraid one of her parents wrote it for her… that bothers me on a complete different level. I took her exam from her and told her to sit until everyone had finished their exams. She held her tears back, and I held mine back. Oh yes, I cried a little on the inside.

Once everyone was finished with their exam I was over my sympathetic reaction and had moved on to being pissed off about Angie cheating. Angie fled the room and burst into tears. I went to my director and told her that I wanted to give Angie a zero on the exam for cheating and my director agreed it was the right thing to do. I dramatically ripped up the exam, and students gasped. It was the talk of the school. “Teacher ripped up Angie’s exam because she cheated.” Damn right I did and I’ll do it again if I have to. Needless to say, no one else cheated on their exams the rest of the day.

So the written exam didn’t go as well as the oral exam… I guess that was to be expected. Some students misspelled words, even when they were given a word bank. That was frustrating. Three students failed. I have to keep in mind that some students just aren’t good test takers. I was never a good test taker. I struggled in middle school. However, I was fortunate enough to have parents and teachers that cared about my education and got me all the help I needed to better understand how I learn. I am still getting to know my kids and how they learn. I am hoping by the next exam I will have figured out each student’s strengths and weaknesses to better help them navigate through learning English.

So being a teacher isn’t always joyful and rewarding. And I think I have confirmed what I’ve always thought to know about myself, I am not cutout to teach little ones. However, I am going to do my best to stay motivated… because the joyful moments, and the rewarding moments… they are so worth it. Seeing my first grader, Candy, light up when I told her she made a 98% on her exam today, it warmed my heart… that was a rewarding moment. Those are the moments I am going to cherish.

Two Blonde Gringas are Better than One

I’ve officially experienced my first earthquake while I was in San Jose this past weekend for my groups mid-service meeting. It wasn’t what I expected it would be like… mainly because I had no idea what was happening. I always imagined that I would know what was happening if I ever experienced an earthquake. However, when the store I was in started shaking and people started pushing me towards the stairs with tears flowing from their eyes, I had no clue as to what was happening. I thought that I was imagining the shaking and thought it was more so caused by the crowd pushing me down the stairs (the only injury I acquired during this experience was a woman stepping on my toe with her high heels). Anyway, I had no idea why people were crying or what the rush was. Turns out it was a 6.0 earthquake. Thank God no one I know was hurt and the only damage I witnessed was some broken glasses that had fallen off the shelves in the store. When the shaking was over people wiped their tears and carried on shopping so my friends and I did the same. Thank goodness, no deaths were reported.

Last week my teaching buddy, Callie, came to visit. During orientation we were each assigned another volunteer as our “teaching buddy.” This person is someone we keep in touch with regularly. We are required to visit each other’s sites during the year and observe one another teaching. Callie came last weekend and stayed until we both left on Wednesday for our mid-service meeting in San Jose. Callie is placed in Guanacaste on the beach at one of, if not the, hottest site. I warned her that the rainy season had just arrived and it would get very chilly at night here. She ended up spending most of her time here in my sweatshirt. We went to a futbol game in my town during the pouring rain on Sunday, which very entertaining. We indulged in my host mom’s great cooking, and Callie shared stories with my host family about what life in Guanacaste is like. (My host family hasn’t traveled around the country much so Guanacaste, which is about a 10-hour bus ride from here, seems like a different country) On Monday, Callie came to school with me. I was excited to show off my students to her. I’ve heard some horror stories from some of the other volunteers about the behavior problems they experience in the classroom, but I don’t have any problem students, besides my one first grade student who has ADD and struggles to sit in his seat. I was looking forward to my little angels impressing Callie with their great behavior.

From the moment we arrived at school, all eyes were on the new Gringa. (I don’t know if I’ve mentioned before that Costa Ricans use the word “gringo” to describe Americans and it is not meant to be offensive) Anyway, Callie whispered to me that she felt like the most interesting person in the world. You would think that my students had never seen a blonde hair, blue eyed, girl before… but wait, I am here everyday! Callie and I told my students we were twins and I think a lot of them bought it. Callie seems to have a lot more patience with the kids than I do. They all circled around her climbed in her lap and braided her hair. I let my kids occasionally braid my hair and sit in my lap, but not for hours at a time. Callie let it carry on for the whole day. I don’t want to sound like the bad cop, I do play with my kids often and hug them constantly. However, I do set some boundaries to prevent my students from using me as a jungle gym. When it was time for my first grade class my students wanted nothing to do with learning. They just wanted to show off for Callie. I couldn’t get them to follow any directions. Instead, they just ran around like crazy kids. I’ve never felt so stressed out during a class before. My only solution was to put them in their seats and have them practice writing. So much for showing off my awesomely behaved students…

Last Tuesday went a little better. I think the initial shock of having another gringa in the classroom had worn off, so the students were better behaved. One of my fourth graders, Angie, gave Callie a stuffed bear. I think she felt guilty for not having a present for me too, even though she has already given me a spandex shirt before. She ran out of the classroom and returned moments later with something for me. It was a dirty, pink tank top that maybe could fit one of my arms, wrapped in a pillowcase. I thanked her as I tried to keep myself from laughing. I am sure her mother is now wondering what happened to her daughter’s pink tank top. I can’t help but smile just thinking about how adorably sweet the thought was…

I was happy to see my students responding so well to Callie and giving her so much love. From what Callie has told me, she gets a lot of love from her students, but she doesn’t have class often. In fact, she has class almost never. I feel like I have a ridiculous amount of days off, but my days off don’t even compare to Callie’s. She has taught a total of 26 days of school. I have taught probably 45-50 days. Even though Callie’s director doesn’t seem too concerned with her student’s education, she hasn’t given up on them. She has heartbreaking stories about some of her students being abused, mentally, physically, and emotionally. I feel so for her students, but I am happy to know that they have Callie as a role model for the year. She is so kind and I know she will bring a lot of light into their dark lives. As far as I know, none of my students have endured the abuse that many of Callie’s students have been subjected to. I feel blessed to be part of this community.

I will be visiting Callie in mid-June. I am looking forward to experiencing another community, especially one so drastically different from mine. Though I am not too stoked about the long bus ride I will have to take, I know it will be worth the ride. Her secluded beach is known as one of the best in Costa Rica. I am looking forward to meeting her host family, students, and towns people and getting a taste of her experience here.

A new found phobia.

I’ve never been afraid of an animal. I didn’t inherit my dad’s fear of snakes, nor do I share my brother’s fear of spiders. I mean, I am not a fan of snakes, especially when I see them in their natural habitat but I can handle being around them. Spiders don’t really freak me out, except for the time my 8^th grade English teacher squashed one and hundreds of spider babies fled from its squished body… that was nasty, but not necessarily scary. No, leave it to me to be afraid of much more legitimate things, like Mickey Mouse and Santa Clause. Ok, so I am not afraid of people dressed up anymore, well not really anyway. My heart still beats really fast when I am approached by someone in costume, but I don’t hide under the table, like I did when I was a child at Chucky Cheese birthday parties, or when Santa came out at the annual Christmas Brunch my family attended… I have grown out of that phase. So, up until today I could honestly say that I was living with no real intense fear of anything. Then I arrived home and found a furry thing with wings waiting for me. My reaction was “HOLY MOTHER OF GOD WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU?!?!” My host mother ran to see what it was I was yelling about in English… I apparently sounded panicked. She laughed and said “Oh Laurita solo es un mariposa.” Translated, “Oh little Laura, its only a butterfly.” I am often looked at like I am crazy for saying things wrong in Spanish, or when I try to explain things that happen in America, like the Easter Bunny… but now it was my time to look at my host mom like she was crazy. This ain’t no butterfly, woman. This looks like the outcome of a bat and tarantula mating session. I am not afraid of bats. I am not afraid of tarantulas. I am now, however, super afraid of what I believe is the mix between the two. It hasn’t done anything to me…yet. Well actually, it hasn’t even moved from the spot on the wall where I first encountered it two hours ago. But I have a feeling this thing has the ability to attack and kill. Maybe I am being a bit dramatic, but I’ve never seen anything like it. I think that is what scares me the most about it. It is only 4 inches from the tip of one wing to the tip of the other. It has very furry legs, two that poke out by its creepy little face like they are going to grab you at any minute. It also has longer hair by its face that, to me, resembles an old man’s bushy eyebrows the poke out in all sorts of directions and curl up. Why am I wasting all this time explaining it to you… a picture is worth a thousand words, right? 

Freaky, am I right? I think I am going to need to pop a few Tylenol PM to have any chance at sleeping tonight. 

Oh, and while we are on the subject of my host family often thinking I am crazy... 

Remember my post a few weeks back when I spoke of a juice that was served to me and I claimed it looked like fish eggs and everyone called me crazy... Well I promised y'all a picture of that the next time I was served it so here is that photo, for your entertainment. 

Am I the only one out there that thinks this "juice" looks like fish eggs?